I thought about it sometimes in my BEFORE life. But only sometimes and mostly because of the first reason maybe or second the most. Never more than that.
But since my BEFORE life was over I had to think about it all the time. Because there was nothing more for me to think about. Except that loneliness and emptiness in my life. Even now, so long after the old me died and the new one appeared it’s beyond my belief how a person can change so much in so little time. I never believed in changes. Of course there is a possibility to work on your flows if you want to badly. What are new year’s resolutions for and Mondays right? Monday is always a good day to start over. No one wants to do it in the middle of a week right. But anyway, I never believed that a person can change much. You can start new habits, new routines, stop smoking, swearing or eating too much if you wish but a permanent and deep change was in my view impossible. All the movies I saw with sudden change of heart were all stupid and not true to me.
And, hahahaha, as it often does happen to people like me, we get a life lesson which makes you reconsider a lot of stuff, you would take for granted in your life. In my case some of them were so drastic that I even had to get friendly with myself again, as a very, very new and different person.